10. To save taxpayer dollars, calls to winning sports teams will be collect.
9. New rule at cabinet meetings, you can't talk until you ride the mechanical bull.
8. Goodbye, boring presidential radio address - hello, Dick Cheney spins the hits of the '80s, '90s and today.
7. Make sure the White House library has lots of books with big print and pictures.
6. Just for fun, issue executive order commanding my brother Jeb to wash my car.
5. First day in office, my mother's face goes up on Mount Rushmore.
4. Look into hiring a security guard for our nuclear secrets.
3. I will not get sick on Japanese leaders like other President Bushes I know.
2. Give the Oval Office one heck of a scrubbing.
And the #1 thing to change when I get into the White House:
1. Tax relief for all Americans, except smart aleck talk show hosts.